Please get help any way you can. tell a teacher, social worker, anyone you trust...sounds like mom needs you to make some adult decisions because she can't...I will pray for you

Posted by bob on Friday, 08/17/07 - 3:47pm

Please, seek help immediately. If you are a minor, call family and ask them to take you away from there. If not, then I would do as you stated to go live with friends. But you, your Mom and your sister do not deserve that kind of treatment. Nobody does.

Posted by meh on Friday, 08/17/07 - 5:24pm

Hi,
I am SO sorry your family is suffering at the hands of your father.

I can totally relate to you. My father beat my mother, my sisters and I regularly and I used to go to school with marks on my arms and such. I don't remember anything with the marks on my body but my mother told me that my school called social services a few times when they saw them.

One day my mother FINALLY had enough. But he had my sisters in one part of the house and had someone picking her up so since I was with her, she told me to start packing our stuff so I could try and get my sisters to go outside and wait to run with us. I remember my father walking into the room while we were doing so and him grabbing my mother...then I don't remember anymore. But my sisters remember and told me he dragged my mother and I to the basement, tied us to a pole and beat us. I totally don't remember it.

I do know he only let my mother leave though. He kept us. Later I remember he got my sisters and I together and asked us who we want to be with. Although we really wanted to be with our mother, we chose him because we were so afraid. Because of this the courts gave my father custody of us.

My mother would come by and sneak to the back and leave us "care packages". One day when she walked off my father saw her and told us to follow him to her and he just told us he would come get us in 6 months and left.

I spoke to him a few times but in the end he was telling us to tell our mother stuff (like "give me my money") so we stopped talking to him. We never saw or heard from him again.

I never realized that he was abusing us until I watched a show on Oprah talking about abuse around 17 years ago I think.

I can tell you that you will not get over all of this quickly, you can get away from it but you still have to deal with all the emotions that go along with it.

You will feel anger, sadness, etc... sometimes one more than the other, sometimes all at the same time... but let yourself feel those emotions. Write what you are thinking and feeling in a journal. Write about some of the bad memories you have. If you need to, try to get counseling.

I never got counseling but thankfully I was able to go through the emotions and I am happy now.

I am happy now. It took years but I am happy now.

it can happen for you too, so please do not think about harming yourself or even killing yourself.

I feel so bad for your sister who also had to suffer through this.

and I feel so sad for your mother because she won't get away from him. Tina Turner had an interview about women getting away from their abusers... she said something like people won't leave until they feel enough is enough... not just when they think that right after being beaten and they are angry.... but after it... when they still think enough is enough.... then they will leave"

I totally butchered that... here is the link to her interview if you want to watch it...and maybe you can let your mother see it:
http://youtube.com/watch?v=LVsmQpjkqbw

Posted by I Know Your Pain on Tuesday, 08/21/07 - 1:08pm