how can you tell if you have depression? i really think i do.

Posted by sdgasdg on Thursday, 12/20/07 - 6:07pm

Ello,

You really should see a doctor for your depression, however I don't believe that drugs are your answer. You are struggling with this because you are trying to stay friends with her.
It doesn't matter what anyone says to me but, I personally don't think it's possible to stay friends with someone you used to be romanticly involved with.
It will be hard for you but you should consider distancing yourself from her as much as possible if you are to have any chance of recovering from the obvious heartbreak you are living with.
It's like you've been wounded, any contact you have with her is keeping your wound open. You have to do what you can to avoid any contact with her, otherwise the wound will never heal.

These are just my ramblings, and take from my words what you will.... but I can tell you that I suffered similar emotional injury when I was about your age. That was 10 years ago for me, I'm now married with 2 beautiful children. If I hadn't gone through it they would not exist, so I am eternally thankfull to the girlfriend I had at the time, for dumping me :o)

You CAN recover from this. You need to get on with your life. Don't forget, you have a great deal to offer someone else, you're special dude!

Remember that the next time you feel down.
Chin up m8, it's Christmas!

Posted by Petey on Saturday, 12/22/07 - 2:40pm

if it helps I want to die too, just wish I had the guts to slash my wrists now

Posted by monni on Monday, 12/24/07 - 12:48pm

Yeah, you should see a doctor. Also stay off the drugs. They aren't good for you and will only make you feel worse. Don't worry, things could also be worse. Instead of smoking drugs maybe you should take in some exercise, running or even just going for walks. It will make you feel better and let you clear your head. Also, I know what it's like to be around your age and be in love. It really hurts when you lose that. It took me a long time to get over the girl. It was hard, but once I got through it I felt much better. In my case, I realized that I was not actually in love. I only thought I was. I was so young and new to having a relationship like that with another person that the intimacy was nice, but it was not really love. I also realized that while the end of the relationship was sad, I should be happy that I had an experience that was so meaningful that I was so sorry it ended. Maybe our experiences are somewhat similar. I am sure that it still hurts, but you've got to stop thinking so much about the past. You can learn from it, but you've got to live in the present.

If you are thinking about suicide you should try calling one of the suicide hotlines or read this article by David Wong: http://www.cracked.com/article_15658_ten-minute-suicide-guide.html
Hopefully that will get you to change your mind.

Posted by dew on Wednesday, 01/9/08 - 9:17pm

i posted this 'confession' and thanks very much for your lengthy responses.

the drugs are the one thing keeping my life (and my anger) in check. i havnt been on them continually since then, ive gone for months without. when theres nothing, no drugs, no wild nights out, is when the pains at the worst. (apart from after ecstacy, the down off that mixed with the depression is unreal so i keep off that now)
And i hardly ever see her. i think in the past 12 months ive seen her 3 or 4 times. tho shes told me shes there for me a few times, even though she had no idea what im going through. ive been making next to no effort with our friendship.
its not her as a person thats driving me mad, its what we went through and the fact that i miss it.

im pretty sure i wont kill myself because im so very against suicide, its so selfish and its wasting a life. i dont need a doctor the same way i dont need a shrink, because i cant easily take advice from those im close to and im pretty sure id sit there in fron of a shrink thinking 'your talking bollox' and not listening to them.
thanks

Posted by Mr B on Thursday, 01/10/08 - 11:45am

hey i realise this is heaps later now, but just in terms of seeing a counsellor/shrink person, i think you should really consider it seriously. i was about as against going to see someone as is possible, because i was like well what can they honestly offer me, psychology is a load of crap and the advice isnt from a position of understanding so whats the point? plus all the stigma surrounding it and the whole opening up to someone who is a complete stranger. but i (was pretty much forced haha) to go and have been now going for nearly a year, i know that sounds scary, but it has been such a good outlet to just get things off your chest. talk it out with someone. with no one to tell anything to you have to carry it all yourself and that is so impossibly heavy. it's more a me monologuing thing than getting any solid so this-will-fix-me sort of advice, although there is some useful stuff advice-wise, but yeah - it's less you listening to them and more them listening to you!
talk to anyone. talk to the wall. i dunno. something i found just got me that bit happier each day was to do something you love every day, just something small and comforting :) like, have a long bath or go for a walk and sit on a hill somewhere, have a whole day watching movies, anything! praise yourself and find the good in yourself and see it and appreciate it!

ive had two friends commit suicide and you're right, its not worth it, such a permanent end to a problem which will pass. really will.
but don't be too proud to see someone ;)
hope you're a bit better now.

Posted by mich on Thursday, 05/29/08 - 7:50am

no life is a waste. Stay clean for a weak and see if you feel better, if you don't go and see a doctor, what you feel isn't normal. You need to let go and move on. Killing your self isn't worth it. You can do so much, but not if you wont let yourself.

Posted by noone on Saturday, 08/2/08 - 8:12pm