any reactions to ME?

i cry more than you think i do. i try to be strong but sometimes cry myself to sleep at night.

i am so overly in love with the guy who loves me forever and always. but i kinda, sorta in a wrong and twisted kind of way, have 'feelings' for someone else too.

theres only 3 people in life who make me truly happy. i love all unconditionally. but sometimes i wonder if i dont hate the one.

i grew up thinking life was easy, simple, convenient, a bed of roses. i now know differently. life is hard and love even harder.

i think about death a lot. in a lot of different ways. sometimes i think i would like to die. sometimes i fear the ones i love will die and leave me alone. sometimes i just wig out when thinking about the concept of forever.

i thnk i am borderline ocd, or adhd or something. i think i should be on medicine but im not.

i question everything. even love. which is the only real concept i believe in in life. recently, i have even questioned God. scary.

i think i have weird obsessions. like i get consumed with things and think about it all the time.

i love sex. but wish it was different? i like it rough. hard. somewhere in the wild, in public.

i love you.